Our Baddie x 2 series is an intimate moment in time grasping the interaction between two baddies as they discuss being diagnosed, survivorship, and everything that comes in between. We hope that you enjoy this series and that it sparks a dialogue amongst the breast cancer community.

Interview With Breast Cancer Survivor, Veronica Laurel, As Told To Baddie Ambassador Keneene Lewis

My sis, a fellow Baddie Ambassador (BA) and overall fierce woman, entered the For The Breast of Us (FTBOU) sisterhood like a quiet storm. We first met while I was waiting for Miranda Gonzales, Cynthia Johnson, and Veronica Laurel to come down the escalator, so we could catch the shuttle to the retreat house. Allow me to provide some context: Miranda and I were part of the inaugural 2020 Baddie Ambassadors cohort, while Cynthia and Veronica were newcomers from the 2021 cohort. All of them were on a flight from Texas, and we arrived at the airport within minutes of each other.

We hopped into the shuttle and headed to the retreat house. Everyone was talking and singing along to the music Marissa played while driving the 15-passenger van. Upon arriving at the house, we discovered that some BAs from both cohorts had arrived earlier. The space was beautiful, filled with music and women everywhere. We entered the house boisterously, lugging our suitcases along. Hugs were exchanged during introductions, with everyone speaking loudly, laughing, helping each other with bags, and admiring the grand space we would occupy for the weekend. To an observer, it would seem as though we had all known one another for years.

I remember noticing her at the first FTBOU Baddie Ambassador retreat, as she somewhat hung back and seemed very observant. In retrospect, I understand her reluctance to jump in right away. When we BAs get together, we are a lively group, but in a great way. We consist of many women of color (WOC) from all over the country, representing a variety of backgrounds and experiences. In this space, 19 women with many commonalities and differences gathered. Breast cancer brought us to FTBOU, but FTBOU created an environment where we could simply be ourselves. The sisterhood was organic, easy, and effortless. For Veronica, who had just endured the whirlwind of being diagnosed with breast cancer and all the challenges that come with active treatment.

Veronica Laurel

In 2019, when their son Marcus went to college, Veronica and her husband Giovanni decided to make some lifestyle changes. In November 2019, they joined a gym and altered their eating habits. Veronica lost 30 lbs., with most of the weight loss occurring in her breast area. At 49 years old, this was when she discovered her lump. That December was filled with various tests, including MRI, MRI biopsy, ultrasound, and biopsy.

Breast cancer was confirmed in January 2020: Stage 2B invasive ductal carcinoma ER/PR+ (Hormone Receptor HER2- breast cancer). Things began to move quickly. Veronica kept a notebook to write everything down and maintain notes about what was to come. All she knew was that she wanted to be done and just live her life. After dealing with everything that came with COVID and having conversations with her husband and sister, she made the decision to go flat. When she heard that there would be additional surgeries for reconstruction, she knew that she did not want that for her life. Veronica chose to have a single mastectomy with no reconstruction on February 6th.

Veronica began chemotherapy in March 2020. Her husband accompanied her to one chemo session before the world shut down due to COVID-19. She ultimately completed 16 rounds, which lasted until July. At the end of August 2020, she began the first of 25 rounds of radiation. In October, when radiation ended, she started a targeted treatment with hormone blocker shots. After receiving two shots, she decided it was too much to go back to the infusion clinic. In November 2020, Veronica underwent an oophorectomy (surgical removal of her ovaries).

At the retreat:

The Baddie Ambassador retreat was the first time many of us met. Another significant factor was that it took place in 2021, amid the COVID-19 pandemic. We were all vaccinated and tested prior to arriving in Orlando, ensuring that we could simply be ourselves. For some, this was our first social interaction outside of our respective bubbles of family, remote work, and doctor appointments. By the end of the retreat weekend, you knew Veronica. You saw Veronica. You heard Veronica.

In the third installment of our amazing new series, Baddie x 2: Growth through Conversations, I was able to catch up with awesome baddie ambassador, Veronica Laurel.

Q & A Veronica Laurel

Hey Sis! Thank you for your time and willingness to share your experience. 

How did you hear about For The Breast Of Us (FTBOU)?

During my active treatment, I turned to Pinterest to search for ways to grow out my chemo hair. I came across someone connected to the Breasties, and then I discovered Hip Hop Happy Hour, where they mentioned the community. That’s how I found FTBOU.

What is your favorite part about being an FTBOU Baddie?

When attending the first retreat, I was initially overwhelmed, not knowing what to expect. However, once I arrived and met everyone, I discovered a community of people who had faced similar situations and looked like me. Due to the peak of COVID, this was the first time I experienced community within the breast cancer space. They all understood the aches and pains I had and accepted me without knowing every detail about me.

What is your favorite memory with FTBOU?

Nothing surpasses the first BA retreat in Orlando. It was there that I connected with various individuals who were all women of color (WOC), specifically Niya Kight, Sharon Kidd, Christina Simmons, and Ginny Shudlick. They were all either “flat” (having had a double mastectomy with no reconstruction) or “uni” (having had a unilateral or single mastectomy with no reconstruction). They looked just like me, and that feeling spoke to my heart.

Were there any BAs who particularly inspired you throughout your journey?

Ginny is an inspiration. She lives life on her own terms, and I find it inspiring. Her confidence makes everything seem effortless.

What is your current treatment plan?

I am taking hormone blockers for a total of five years; currently, I am two and a half years into the five-year plan.

What complementary therapies have you tried?

I haven’t tried any complementary therapies. At my job, we have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) that I’ve considered, but I haven’t used it yet. December is a challenging and triggering month for me. When I felt overwhelmed, I considered using the program again.

What was your theme song during your treatment?

I didn’t have one specific song. I listened to a variety of music, primarily from the ’80s and ’90s. I found myself gravitating towards anything by Prince because it made me happy.

Mentally, what do you do on those hard days to push through?

I feel like I just have to sit with it. I have a room in my house that is my personal space, where my FTBOU paintings from the last two retreats are displayed. I spend time with myself there. Sometimes, I watch a sad movie to release my tears. Lastly, I rely heavily on my sister, Amy. I would call her, and she has always been a great listener.

What do you do that you feel helps you physically overall?

I started doing yoga again. My revision surgery prevented me from engaging in any physical activity for four months, which was overwhelming. When I was finally able to start moving again, I returned to practicing yoga. Recently, I completed a 31-day yoga challenge in January. Additionally, I enjoy going for walks and exploring trails. I’ve discovered that being in nature has benefitted me overall, even though I’ve never been much of an outdoorsy person.

Have you made any other lifestyle changes that seem to work for you?

The year before my breast cancer diagnosis, Gio and I had already made several lifestyle changes. Once active treatment was over, I returned to those changes. I now have that belly weight that comes from surgery, and it just irritates me. I’m eating healthier and believe in moderation for all things. I’m simply more conscious of my actions and choices.

What effect did breast cancer have on your marriage?

I was the planner in the family, and I consciously took a step back. This shift helped balance our relationship, resulting in a more equal partnership. We have been married for 28 years and have experienced ups and downs, so I was worried that breast cancer might break us, especially with my decision to go flat. Giovanni and I had conversations about it, although the choice was ultimately mine.

Who is in your support system?

My support system includes my husband, Gio, who has been there for me through everything that comes with active treatment and continues to be. My son, Marcus, who lives three hours away in Waco, would always show up whenever I needed him. It’s as if he just knew when I needed his support.

My sister, Amy, is also a crucial part of my support system. Due to COVID and chemotherapy, I couldn’t see her for about four months. We talked every day, and since we work at the same hospital, I would see her from time to time. Eventually, I managed to sneak in a visit with her in July 2020.

My family, including my parents and my two brothers, has also been supportive. Between breast cancer and COVID, there was a massive adjustment, and I missed seeing them as they live in Corpus Christi. My family would participate in Zoom calls to stay connected. I remember being able to visit my brother and his family in August, wearing a face mask to stay safe.

How has your diagnosis affected your family?

My diagnosis has changed our family for the better. Now, we all focus on living our best lives. I talk about this with each of them all the time. We have made a conscious effort to stay connected (text, Facetime, visit my parent’s house even if we’re all crowded, etc.) and be more intentional. We took a family vacation last summer to Universal Studios with my brother, my sister, and our families. Being together is the most important thing, regardless of where we are or what we decide to do.

My dad now calls every single one of us every day. It started with me after being diagnosed, and now he calls my brother and sister too. I also have an aunt who has been sending a prayer every Thursday since my diagnosis. I don’t know why she chose Thursdays, but I welcome her prayers every week.

What is a typical day like for you now?

I work at a children’s hospital in development. In my free time, I enjoy spending time with my husband. He is a chef, but we cook together, watch shows together, go on walks together, and travel. We like taking weekend getaways to various places in Texas.

What parts of the old YOU are still a part of YOU today?

My humor and silliness remain a significant part of who I am. I always talk about teasing and embarrassing my son because, well, if you’re not embarrassing your kids, then what are you really doing?! I want to stay young at heart, and my humor helps me achieve that.

What are your favorite parts about the new YOU that the old YOU didn’t have?

I spend time being intentional with my friends, letting them know that I’m here for them. I engage in conversations on social media instead of just scrolling, and I make sure to leave comments on posts to let people know that I saw them and their content. I’ve become more intentional in my relationships.

How do you advocate?

I’ve had a couple of conversations about this. To me, advocacy is about holding space to let others speak. Sometimes, it’s just a matter of giving them the space to say it out loud. I was asked if I was a flat advocate; no, I am not, but I am a choice advocate. I encourage everyone to make the right choice that fits their lifestyle and where they are at that moment. Those choices are very individualized and personalized. I welcome people asking questions (how I deal with this or that in my relationship, finding clothes, etc.) and offer support in those moments when they need someone to talk to.

Some call themselves thrivers, and others say survivor. What does it mean to you to be a thriver/survivor?

To me, being a survivor means living my best life, not taking things for granted, and being present in the moment. Prior to cancer, I was a saver, but now I focus on doing things. I use fancy dishes for a sandwich, take vacations, buy patio furniture, and take pictures, making sure that I’m in them as well. I can confidently say that I’m enjoying life.

We as WOC must survive/thrive on many different levels, sometimes to the point where we can’t slip up. How tired are you from just thriving?

I am tired on different levels. It is more about being a woman. At work, I am part of a leadership team with two males and me. There are unspoken expectations, and I am treated a certain way because I am a woman. These situations reveal just how little progress we have actually made. I am always advocating for more women on our board. We always honor a community leader, and it was always a man. I had to speak up for the women in the community who deserved to be honored and recognized.

I speak some broken Spanish, but I am learning. During one of my appointments with my surgical oncologist, I shared how I advocate and give suggestions. He recommended that I keep learning Spanish. He mentioned the impact I could make in the community once I could speak the language fluently by sharing my story and providing tips and resources.

What is something that you want to tell the lawmakers/change makers?

We deserve access to care, not based on what an insurance company thinks we need. It should be based on what we feel we need and then what the doctors think we need. Health care needs to be more affordable and accessible.

What concerns/worries do you have about breast cancer?

I worry about those who do not know how to navigate the health care system. I encourage them to question costs, seek financial assistance, write things off, understand how insurance works, check for incorrect ICD-10 codes, and ensure nothing was labeled incorrectly, etc.

Why do you feel it is important for us to reach out to your culture?

In Hispanic culture, it is important because illnesses, including cancer, are often not discussed openly. This makes it hard to keep track of family medical history. We need to normalize speaking up about health issues, so that we know our familial history and what is going on with our loved ones.

I knew I had an aunt who was sick and had cancer, but no one knew what type she had. People would say she had cancer, but when I asked, “What kind of cancer?” no one knew the specifics. They just knew she had cancer.

How do you want to leave your mark in the breast cancer community?

If that means promoting FTBOU so that they can find it more easily, knowing who, why, and what we do, I will continue to do my part to put FTBOU out there. I want FTBOU to be one of the first resources WOC have access to as soon as they are diagnosed

I want to continue to lay the foundation for them with FTBOU. It is a very inclusive organization; we encourage you to join FTBOU and explore other organizations as well. I encourage everyone to be open to the fact that you can get different things from many different organizations. Whether you need to jump from organization to organization, from day to day, it’s okay. We should all be working together.

What are three things you would tell someone who was just told that they have BC?

Advocate for yourself. Ask questions. It’s okay to challenge your doctor.

It’s overwhelming, but it’s something you can get through. Take notes, record the appointment, and bring someone with you.

There is life on the other side of being diagnosed. Know that it’s not bad to have hope.

What are you still hoping to accomplish?

I’m not sure specifically. I’m on a good trajectory in finding my voice in this space and fleshing out exactly what I want to do. I want to continue to help people when they’re making their own difficult choices. I feel that I’ve found my stride and become more confident. I want to continue to learn and build on all of this.

If you were to write a blog about yourself tomorrow, what would the title be?

Prioritize Joy!

How can our readers connect with you?

IG: vslaurel

This chat with my amazing Sis was an absolute blast! We learned so much about each other, sharing stories and laughs along the way. Veronica embodies the idea that we all have to find our unique way to advocate and share our experiences – it’s all about choice. Each of us has to figure out the perfect lane to hold space in. Veronica is currently on a fantastic journey of finding her voice through her breast cancer experience, and I’m confident that she’ll continue to make a difference in the community as she navigates her path. Keep doing your thing, creating your way, and lighting up the world, V!